Jul 5, 2011

Who Are You, Anyway?

As lunch time rolled around yesterday, my husband decided to make everyone sandwiches. What a great thing. He's always so helpful that way. Feeling a little guilty, I went into the kitchen to give him a hand and noticed he'd put the slices of bread on a cutting board that wasn't as clean as I would have liked it. It wasn't filthy, mind you, but I have a little "germaphobia" thing going on so I always sanitize the cutting boards before I use them. I quickly told him about the problem (as I saw it) and he got upset with me. Suddenly, the conversation wasn't about the bread or the cutting board, but about who was wrong and who was right. All kinds of past offenses wove their way into this heated discussion and before long I realized it was no long about who was wrong or right either. It was just BLAH, BLAH, BLAH! Nobody was listening and neither one of us was making any sense.

And then it hit me.

The real problem hadn't even made its way into the conversation. The REAL problem was accepting each other just the way we are, even if that means being picky about a stupid cutting board being perfectly clean. I like things clean. He's a guy. Enough said, right?

I needed to allow him to be who he was and he needed to allow me to be who I was, regardless of what that meant. Of course, this sparked all kinds of thoughts throughout the day about being myself and not giving in to demands people make on me. Who cares if I'm not like everyone else? Who cares if I do things differently? I happen to like ME just the way I am. I'm unique. I'm a rebel. I'm ME! Deal with it, world.

"Be Yourself. An original is always worth more than a copy." -unknown

How do you deal with people when they want you to change or think you're not GOOD ENOUGH? What makes you YOU?


  1. I'd be so thrilled if my husband made food for us that I wouldn't care how he did it! Altho I would stop him from cutting vegetables on a cutting board that had been used for meat. I would definitely draw the line at that.

  2. I refuse to change just because someone demands it. I will change if I feel that it will make me a better person in the end or I try to change if my behavior is truly hurting someone.
    I'm a rebel, I'm a fighter. I'm also very passionate about the things that make me FEEL something.
    Funny, I sort of had this same argument a long time ago with my husband over how to hang clothes properly and fold towels. What it comes down to, is be thankful the other has even done something and let them do it their way, you can do it your way when you are the one doing laundry or making a sandwich. :)

  3. Yesterday my cousin told her neighbors I was vegetarian, and they looked at me blankly. It made me feel outlandish for eating a bit differently than they do. I guess as readers and writers everyone likes an interesting and original character. So why should we as people be afraid to be interesting and original?

  4. If we were all the same, life would be really boring.
    Oh, and I'm a clean freak as well when it comes to my food, so your objection to the dirty cutting board made perfect sense to me!

  5. I'm pretty picky about things being clean too, so it's better if I don't see what someone else is doing to prepare food... ;) Ignorance is bliss, as they say!

    I draw the line at HAIRS in my food...ew.

  6. A great little lesson from just making sandwiches. I love it.

  7. Sounds very like the "Discussions" in my house.

  8. Good question. I don't know--guess I'll have to give that one some thought.

  9. Ahhh ... I'm not sure. I'm good enough for my husband. And I think for my friends. But I still struggle being "good enough" to my family. Or maybe it's just my perception of what they expect from me. This is a really loaded question! And I don't have the answer! Ahhh!

  10. I'm still working through my insecurities about being good enough for people. So if someone wanted me to change right now... I'd be hurt.

    Hopefully soon I can just be confident being me. :)