Feb 4, 2010

WHEW! What a Ride!

I was talking to my friend yesterday about how, where my writing career is concerned, I've felt like I'm riding a roller coaster, especially the past few weeks. One day I'll be happy and anxious to start on a new project and the next . . . well . . . this picture pretty much sums it up.

The thing is . . . I used to love the roller coaster. The thrill of the ride. The anticipation as the thick cables and chains pulled the cars to the top of the arc. The way you could see forever while you crest the peek and the sinking feeling as your stomach seemed to rise up in your throat as the coaster plummeted to the deepest valley and then began its ascent to the top again. I loved the way the wind blew through my hair and that you could scream at the top of your lungs and everyone understood. Everyone knew what you were feeling because they were going through the same thing and screamed right along with you. And then when you were done, how you could hardly walk and felt like you wanted to puke, but dang if you didn't get right back on and do it again.

Well, I still like the highs, but that sinking feeling and the desire to scream at the top of my lungs doesn't seem to bring the same thrill that it used to. And to be honest, I'm not too happy with the shaky legs and the urge to vomit the contents of my stomach all over the place. And then there's the feeling of loneliness, like I'm the only one on that coaster and the only one screaming, even though, deep down I know I'm not.

The worst part is I don't seem to be able to get off the ride, not even for a brief rest. When I finally think I'm going into the little station and I'll be able to get off and rest for a while, someone hits the switch and the ride starts all over again. It's getting to the point where I just close my eyes and hold on for dear life, not even enjoying the high points and the view anymore. So how do I get off, or at least learn to enjoy it again? I'd love to hear from you if you've been through something similar or have some great advice. In the meantime, I'll be the one screaming


  1. I'm currently puking my guts and screaming too. Sorry, I'm no help. =P

  2. hey you... wow. the post was definitely well descriptive of exactly how it feels. Though, i've never been a coaster fan to begin with, but that pic not only terrified me, but painted a very accurate pic of how i feel sometimes. i hope you're okay :(

    Actually, i've been thinking about it lately, because it hits on something i thought of doing for your guest post in april. :) For me, one of two things happen: either i get sick of it, or i get burned out and don't care anymore. I found the best thing for me to do was to find a new passion that gives me that excited thrill feeling that the previous ones use to... and when i can't handle the one, i have the other to turn to. Sometimes life doesn't let you 'get off', but you can always 'switch tracks'. It lets me reset myself, and i'm able to return to my first 'tracks' with new drive. And if one additional passion doesn't work, i get two or three :) enough to keep things fresh and new. (like my sword classes) :D

  3. I love roller coasters! I don't love the roller coaster ride of writing. And . . . I am now officially a follower!

  4. Christine, hang in there. I know you are meant for great things. Everything has a purpose behind it. Chin up and remember that Heavenly Father is very mindful of you.


  5. The good part is, the ride always goes back up ;)